Googling Your Girlfriend

I can't and won't take credit for this idea...I read it on another blog that I found through another blog and now I am bringing it here for you to try.

Go to Google and type in the searchbox "how to convince your girlfriend" and see the completions they recommend.  

You cannot make this stuff up!

The Value of Chips

Whether I am playing at an API event, or at a casino I always try to keep in perspective that the deeper I get into a tournament the more value my chips have, eventually getting to a point that I can put a real numeric value to them.  

For many API players this might seem crazy since the tournaments are "free", but as you get deeper in API nightly tournaments or API major tournaments the closer you get to the final 2, 3 or 8 that get prizes you can literally put a real value on your chips.  Most API players won't get this even still, so let me give a great example.  

Back in November I played in the API Quarterly at The Tavern, eventually winning the tournament.  As I got closer and closer to the final table my chips starting taking on a monetary value in my head based upon the prizes for various positions at the final table.  In the end the value of my chips was a trip to the 2009 WSOP.  Early on in the tournament my chips had little to no value since there was such a long way to go before the likelihood of winning was even possible, but as I moved through the tournament their value and the importance of preserving and gaining more became higher and higher until eventually I could put a real dollar value on them.  To be clear, no cash is awarded at API - just prizes and sponsorships - but a prize or a sponsorship cost someone somewhere something and because of this you can assess value.

Another great example is in a Sit and Go Tournament.  If the tournament started with 9 or 10 players and there are now 4 left and only 3 are paid your chips are almost worth the 3rd place cash.  On Full Tilt in a $10 tournament of 10 players that would be $20 and each subsequent position adds more value to your chips based on the prize structure.  Even if you have $1 in chips left and get pocket aces with 3 other players in the pot, but 2 are all in and one is a massive chip stack your $1 in chips is probably worth $20 - so do you play and risk getting knocked out to win $3 in chips or do you fold and stand a great chance of cashing?  Simple - YOU FOLD.  Your $1 in chips has a real value of $20 in prize money.  If you go out the value of your chips is $0.

I have come to believe that in MTT's or SnG's at casinos or API that this general philosophy is one of the key differentiators between the good players and the bad players.  Loose play early on in either type of tournament can cost you too much and deposition you for a run in the end.  You have to be in to win and without a doubt you will need to gamble and get lucky at some point if you are going to take it down, but a little understanding about the concept I explain here will definitely take you farther.

Crappy Company - Crappy Cars

All the bailouts of automakers that the U.S. Government did a while back really pissed me off - and now this from Consumer Reports to enrage me even more!

"Chrysler, which tied with Suzuki for last place in our 2008 ranking, fared even worse this year. Overall reliability of Chrysler vehicles, which was average last year, dropped to below average this year. No Chrysler, Dodge, or Jeep vehicles are recommended."

At one time in my life I worked briefly at a Dodge dealership and back then their quality was absolutely horrible.  It seems times don't change and verifies one of my core business beliefs.

Behind every crappy product is a crappy company.  

Giving Over 100%

This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. Experience.

Here is a little something someone sent me that is indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud. 

This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this: 
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? 
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions: 

If: 
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z 

Is represented as: 
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26. 

Then: 

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K 
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% 

And 

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E 
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% 

But , 

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E 
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% 

And, 

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T 
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% 

AND, look how far Ass Kissing will take you. 

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G 
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118% 

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

Purim for Idiots

I almost called this post "Purim for Dummies", but figured I had less chance getting sued by the "Idiots" guys whose books don't sell nearly as well and can usually be found on the clearance rack of your local bookstore.  Part of it seems to be the titles, which include Tattoos, Tweakers, All You Can Eat Buffets, Modeling, Astrology, etc. for Idiots.  

Maybe it is just that I am in a foul mood that I started today's blog with a jab at what I see as an omen to shear stupidity, but now to the topic at hand - what is Purim?

Purim is a Jewish holiday and yet another celebration of Jewish deliverance...this time from the hands of the Persians.  As told in the Book of Esther, the high ranking political advisor to King Ahasueres, a.k.a as Xerxes I of Persia, named Haman had hatched a plan to kill all the Jews in ancient Persia, but the plan was foiled by Esther (Ahasueres Queen) and Mordecai (another politician).  In short, Haman was a bad guy who not only wanted to kill the Jews, but also Ahasueres and in the end was hung for his treachery in a gallows he had constructed for Mordecai.

The moral to this story is simple.  Don't "F" with the Jews, not all politicians are evil (just most of them), good always triumphs over evil and never trust a guy named Haman.  We celebrate it by trading gifts of food and drink, giving charity to the poor, have a celebratory meal, wearing masks, drinking wine, and other celebratory events.  

That is why I plan on attending the Hawks game, throwing a buck to a homeless guy on the way in, eating all the free food and drink, hiding my face when we leave and fully leveraging any additional benefits of Purim that I haven't even thought of yet on my gentile friends.  

How To Lose 20 in 10

Recently I have learned how to lose 20 pounds in only 10 days and I am about to share it with you, my valued reader.  Before we go further let me say that I do not endorse this method - it is painful, uncomfortable and above all unhealthy.

Good.  Now that we have that on the sidelines let me tell you how I lost 20 lbs in only 10 days - one word - Gastroenteritis.  Gastroenteritis is a joint irritation and inflammation of the stomach and intestines that causes one to feel constantly nauseated, consistently vomit, have cramps while seeing massive amounts of watery grossness be violently thrust from your pooper.  Got the picture?  This was not fun and I am not even fully recovered yet after 10 days, but the bright side is I have managed to lose 20 pounds of my body weight, or a mere 7.5% of my total body mass.  

I am still dealing with the lingering effects of the medication I was put on to eliminate this scourge from my body.  The medication solved the queasy stomach and knocked out the virus or bacteria that caused my discomfort, but in return made me drowsy, sensitive to sunlight and unbelievably dizzy (now doesn't that sound like fun!).

In hindsight I don't know if it was the crab cakes at a business dinner just outside Philadelphia in the Desmond Hotel that gave it to me or the Krystal meal I had the next night before our regular poker game, but in the future I will be sure to avoid both at all possible cost.

I feel better now that I have written about my illness and the effects it has had on me and pray that in the next day or two I am back to my old self - just 20 pounds lighter.

An Insider View on Flight 1549

Normally I wouldn't post an email I received to my blog, but I got this one through some trusted sources and found it amazing and compelling enough to share.  It is a first hand account of a passenger on the flight - a Partner at Heidrick & Struggles who was on Flight 1549.

"As many of you now know, Gerry McNamara was on US Airways Flight 1549 last week. We caught up with him to discuss the harrowing incident and present his stirring account:

Thursday was a difficult day for all of us at the firm and I left the Park Avenue office early afternoon to catch a cab bound for LaGuardia Airport. I was scheduled for a 5pm departure, but able to secure a seat on the earlier flight scheduled to leave at 3PM. As many of us who fly frequently often do, I recall wondering if I'd just placed myself on a flight I shouldn't be on!

Just prior to boarding I finished up a conference call with my associate, Jenn Sparks, and our placement, the CIO of United Airlines. When I told him that I was about to board a US Airways flight, we all had a little fun with it.

I remember walking on the plane and seeing a fellow with grey hair in the cockpit and thinking "that's a good thing... I like to see grey hair in the cockpit!"

I was seated in 8F, on the starboard side window and next to a young business man. The New York to Charlotte flight is one I've taken what seems like hundreds of times over the years. We take off north over the Bronx and as we climb, turn west over the Hudson River to New Jersey and tack south. I love to fly, always have, and this flight plan gives a great view of several NY landmarks including Yankee Stadium and the George Washington Bridge.

I had started to point out items of interest to the gentleman next to me when we heard a terrible crash - a sound no one ever wants to hear while flying - and then the engines wound down to a screeching halt.

10 seconds later, there was a strong smell of jet fuel. I knew we would be landing and thought the pilot would take us down no doubt to Newark Airport. As we began to turn south I noticed the pilot lining up on the river still - I thought - en route for Newark.

Next thing we heard was "Brace for impact!" - a phrase I had heard many years before as an active duty Marine Officer but never before on a commercial air flight. Everyone looked at each other in shock. It all happened so fast we were astonished!

We began to descend rapidly and it started to sink in. This is the last flight. I'm going to die today. This is it. I recited my favorite bible verse, the Lord's Prayer, and asked God to take care of my wife, children, family and friends.

When I raised my head I noticed people texting their friends and family.... getting off a last message. My blackberry was turned off and in my trouser pocket, no time to get at it. Our descent continued and I prayed for courage to control my fear and help if able.

I quickly realized that one of two things was going to happen, neither of them good. We could hit by the nose, flip and break up, leaving few if any survivors, bodies, cold water, fuel. Or we could hit one of the wings and roll and flip with the same result. I tightened my seat belt as tight as I could possibly get it so I would remain intact.

As we came in for the landing, I looked out the windows and remember seeing the buildings in New Jersey, the cliffs in Weehawken, and then the piers. The water was dark green and sure to be freezing cold. The stewardesses were yelling in unison "Brace! Brace! Brace!"

It was a violent hit - the water flew up over my window - but we bobbed up and were all amazed that we remained intact.

There was some panic - people jumping over seats and running towards the doors, but we soon got everyone straightened out and calmed down. There were a lot of people that took leadership roles in little ways. Those sitting at the doors over the wing did a fantastic job, they were opened in a New York second! Everyone worked together - teamed up and in groups to figure out how to help each other.

I exited on the starboard side of the plane, 3 or 4 rows behind my seat through a door over the wing and was, I believe, the 10th or 12th person out. I took my seat cushion as a flotation device and once outside saw I was the only one who did.. none of us remembered to take the yellow inflatable life vests from under the seat.

We were standing in 6-8 inches of water and it was freezing. There were two women on the wing, one of whom slipped off into the water. Another passenger and I pulled her back on and had her kneel down to keep from falling off again. By that point we were totally soaked and absolutely frozen from the icy wind.

The ferries were the first to arrive, and although they're not made for rescue, they did an incredible job. I know this river, having swum in it as a boy. The Hudson is an estuary - part salt and part fresh water - and moves with the tide. I could tell the tide was moving out because we were tacking slowly south towards Ellis Island, The Statue of Liberty, and The Battery.

 The first ferry boat pulled its bow up to the tip of the wing, and the first mate lowered the Jacobs ladder down to us. We got a couple of people up the ladder to safety, but the current was strong pushing the stern of the boat into the inflatable slide and we were afraid it would puncture it. There must have been 25 passengers in it by now. Only two or three were able to board the first ferry before it moved away.

Another ferry came up, and we were able to get the woman that had fallen into the water on the ladder, but she just couldn't move her legs and fell off. Back onto the ladder she went; however, the ferry had to back away because of the swift current. A helicopter arrived on station (nearly blowing us all off the wing) and followed the ferry with the woman on the ladder. We lost view of the situation but I believe the helicopter lowered its basket to rescue her.

As more ferries arrived, we were able to get people up on the boats a few at a time. The fellow in front of me fell off the ladder and into the water. When we got him back on the ladder he could not move his legs to climb. I couldn't help him from my position so I climbed up the ladder to the ferry deck where the first mate and I hoisted the Jacobs ladder with him on it. When he got close enough we grabbed his trouser belt and hauled him on deck. We were all safely off the wing.

We could not stop shaking. Uncontrollable shaking. The only thing I had with me was my blackberry, which had gotten wet and was not working. (It started working again a few hours later).

The ferry took us to the Weehawken Terminal in NJ where I borrowed a phone and called my wife to let her know I was okay. The second call I made was to Jenn. I knew she would be worried about me and could communicate to the rest of the firm that I was fine. At the terminal, first responders assessed everyone's condition and sent people to the hospital as needed. As we pulled out of Weehawken my history kicked in and I recall it was the site of the famous duel between Alexander Hamilton and Aaron Burr in 1804. Thankfully I left town in better condition than Mr. Hamilton who died of a mortal wound the next day! I stayed with my sister on Long Island that evening, then flew home the next day.

I am struck by what was truly a miracle. Had this happened a few hours later, it would have been pitch dark and much harder to land. Ferries would no longer have been running after rush hour and it would not have been the same uplifting story. Surely there would have been fatalities, hypothermia, an absolute disaster!

I witnessed the best of humanity that day. I and everyone on that plane survived and have been given a second chance. It struck me that in our work we continuously seek excellence to solve our client's leadership problems. We talk to clients all the time about the importance of experience and the ability to execute.

Experience showed up big time on Flight 1549 as our pilot was a dedicated, trained, experienced professional who executed flawlessly when he had to.

I have received scores of emails from across the firm and I am so grateful for the outpouring of interest and concern. We all fly a great deal or work with someone who does and so I wanted to share this story - the story of a miracle. I am thankful to be here to tell the tale.

There is a great deal to be learned including: Why has this happened to me? Why have I survived and what am I supposed to do with this gift? For me, the answers to these questions and more will come over time, but already I find myself being more patient and forgiving, less critical and judgmental.

For now I have 4 lessons I would like to share:

1. Cherish your families as never before and go to great lengths to keep your promises.

2. Be thankful and grateful for everything you have and don't worry about the things you don't have.

3. Keep in shape. You never know when you'll be called upon to save our own life, or help someone else save theirs.

4. When you fly, wear practical clothing. You never know when you'll end up in an emergency or on an icy wing in flip flops and pajamas and of absolutely no use to yourself or anyone else."