Purim for Idiots

I almost called this post "Purim for Dummies", but figured I had less chance getting sued by the "Idiots" guys whose books don't sell nearly as well and can usually be found on the clearance rack of your local bookstore.  Part of it seems to be the titles, which include Tattoos, Tweakers, All You Can Eat Buffets, Modeling, Astrology, etc. for Idiots.  

Maybe it is just that I am in a foul mood that I started today's blog with a jab at what I see as an omen to shear stupidity, but now to the topic at hand - what is Purim?

Purim is a Jewish holiday and yet another celebration of Jewish deliverance...this time from the hands of the Persians.  As told in the Book of Esther, the high ranking political advisor to King Ahasueres, a.k.a as Xerxes I of Persia, named Haman had hatched a plan to kill all the Jews in ancient Persia, but the plan was foiled by Esther (Ahasueres Queen) and Mordecai (another politician).  In short, Haman was a bad guy who not only wanted to kill the Jews, but also Ahasueres and in the end was hung for his treachery in a gallows he had constructed for Mordecai.

The moral to this story is simple.  Don't "F" with the Jews, not all politicians are evil (just most of them), good always triumphs over evil and never trust a guy named Haman.  We celebrate it by trading gifts of food and drink, giving charity to the poor, have a celebratory meal, wearing masks, drinking wine, and other celebratory events.  

That is why I plan on attending the Hawks game, throwing a buck to a homeless guy on the way in, eating all the free food and drink, hiding my face when we leave and fully leveraging any additional benefits of Purim that I haven't even thought of yet on my gentile friends.